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I've fired my secretary

Posted: Fri 18 Apr, 2008 1:29 pm
by kaptain.kopter
Today is my birthday and I really didn’t feel like waking up this morning. I managed to pull myself together and go downstairs for breakfast, hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, “Happy Birthday!”, and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone “Happy Birthday.” I thought… Well, that’s marriage for you, but the kids… They will remember.

My kids came trampling down the stairs to breakfast, ate their breakfast, and didn’t say a word to me. So when I made it out of the house and started for work, I felt pretty dumpy and despondent.

As I walked into the studio, my secretary Joanne said, “Good Morning Martin, and by the way Happy Birthday!” It felt a bit better knowing that at least someone remembered. I worked in a zombie like fashion until about one o’clock, when Joanne knocked on my door and said, “You know, it’s such a beautiful day outside, and it’s your Birthday, why don’t we go out for lunch, just you and me.” I said, “Thanks, Joanne, that’s the best thing I’ve heard all day. Let’s go!”

We went to lunch but not where we’d normally go. Instead she took me to a quiet bistro with a private table. We had a couple of mixed drinks and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Joanne said, “You know, It’s such a beautiful day… We don’t have to go right back to the office, do we?” I replied with “I suppose not. What do you have in mind?” She said, “Let’s go to my apartment, it’s just around the corner.”

After arriving at her apartment, Joanne turned to me and said, “If you don’t mind, I’m going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I’ll be right back.” “Ok.” I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake…
Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends, all singing “Happy Birthday”.
And I just sat there…
On the couch…
Naked.

Posted: Fri 18 Apr, 2008 1:36 pm
by Roboframer
Chortle!

Posted: Fri 18 Apr, 2008 1:52 pm
by The Crofter
Priceless...Happy Birthday

Posted: Fri 18 Apr, 2008 1:53 pm
by prospero
Bloody Hell. You had me going for while there Kap. :oops:

btw. If you ever do get into a real situation like that (without the suprise party) and have to think of a good excuse, all you need do is get a piece of chalk and put it behind your ear and go home and tell the absolute truth. Women don't miss anything, so the wife will call you a lying bastard and accuse you of being out all night playing darts.

So that's alright then. :lol:

Posted: Fri 18 Apr, 2008 4:27 pm
by Moglet
ImageHappy Birthday, Kaptain K!! Image

Posted: Fri 18 Apr, 2008 4:43 pm
by kaptain.kopter
Thanks all.

Not really worth celebrating but can't turn down the wife taking me out for a curry. :D

Martin

Posted: Fri 18 Apr, 2008 6:28 pm
by Mary Case GCF
Just read this thread. Belated hippo birdie 2 ewe, KK. Loved the joke :clap: :clap:

Posted: Fri 18 Apr, 2008 8:34 pm
by osgood
Happy Birthday Kaptain!
I hope you have plenty more of them and good health to enjoy them all!

Posted: Sat 19 Apr, 2008 9:14 am
by WelshFramer
Just make the birthday last all week end so us latecomers can wish you happy birthday too. :cake:

Posted: Sat 19 Apr, 2008 9:34 am
by Spit
Oh no! I'll have to have several drinks for KK tonight, on top of a few for someone elses B'day and the ones I was going to drink anyway! It's going to be a dark ale night, so the quilt's going to be hovering 4ft above the bed by the morning! (parp) :oops:

Posted: Sat 19 Apr, 2008 11:56 am
by Moglet
TMI!!! :shock: