Blond Joke

Post by **John** » Tue 30 May, 2006 11:54 am

The funniest joke I heard so far this year: -

A blind man enters a ladies bar by mistake. He finds his way
to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells
to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blond joke?"

The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep,
husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke sir,
you should know five things....

1 - The bartender is a blond girl.

2 - The bouncer is a blond girl.

3 - I'm a 6 feet tall, 200-pound blond woman with a black
belt in karate.

4 - The woman sitting next to me is blond and is a
professional wrestler.

5 - The lady to your right is a blond and is a professional
weightlifter.

Now think about it seriously Mister, do you still wanna tell
that joke?"

The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and says,
"Nah.... not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."

Roboframer · Post by **Roboframer** » Tue 30 May, 2006 6:18 pm

Congrats on the new forum John......

A guy sitting at a bar at Gatwick South noticed a really beautiful woman
sitting next to him.

He thought to himself: "Wow, she's so gorgeous she must be a flight
attendant. But which airline does she work for?"

Hoping to pick her up, he leaned towards her and uttered the Delta Airlines slogan: "Love to fly and it shows?"

She gave him a blank, confused stare and he immediately thought to himself: "Dash, she doesn't work for Delta."

A moment later, another slogan popped into his head. He leaned towards
her again, "Something special in the air?"

She gave him the same confused look. He mentally kicked himself, and
scratched Singapore Airlines off the list.

Next he tried the Thai Airways slogan: "Smooth as Silk."

This time the woman turned on him "What the F*** do you want?"

The man smiled, then slumped back in his chair, and said.......

"Ahhhhh, EasyJet"

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed 31 May, 2006 7:40 am

A blonde enters her local picture framers shop and asks to have a photograph framed. The framer discovers after a short discussion that the photo is of her father who has just died, she does not have that many photos of her father and this is her favorite, but she would have prefered it even more if it was not taken with him wearing his hat.

The framer seeing a chance to sell-up at this point tells the blonde that he is able to arrange for the photo to be digitally edited to remove the hat. The blonde is delighted and immediately asks for this service. The framer then explains that he will need to take some information to enable this to done and then asks which side her father parted his hair. To this she replies, Oh you'll be able to see that when you take his hat off!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed 31 May, 2006 7:45 am

Sorry, didn't get the log in prompt.
Joke was from Not your average framer.
Cheers,
Mark

Roboframer · Post by **Roboframer** » Wed 31 May, 2006 9:29 pm

LOL Mark,

I am stealing that one and posting it on The Grumble, and elsewhere too!

Not your average framer · Wed 31 May, 2006 10:14 pm

John,

It gets told slightly differently each time I tell it. I think you could add that he decided to sell-up because she was a blonde!

Cheers,
Mark

Post by **John** » Wed 31 May, 2006 10:21 pm

Not Your Average Framer wrote:To this she replies, Oh you'll be able to see that when you take his hat off!

This has brought back a memory...

I once spent a good part of a day on a photograph, 'removing' a wrought iron gate that was obscuring the bride's frock. To this day, the customer is convinced that the job was done in a few seconds with "That marvellous rubbing out tool"

This from a highly regarded artist, and he hasn't got a single blonde hair.