I've fired my secretary

kaptain.kopter · Post by **kaptain.kopter** » Fri 18 Apr, 2008 1:29 pm

Today is my birthday and I really didn’t feel like waking up this morning. I managed to pull myself together and go downstairs for breakfast, hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, “Happy Birthday!”, and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone “Happy Birthday.” I thought… Well, that’s marriage for you, but the kids… They will remember.

My kids came trampling down the stairs to breakfast, ate their breakfast, and didn’t say a word to me. So when I made it out of the house and started for work, I felt pretty dumpy and despondent.

As I walked into the studio, my secretary Joanne said, “Good Morning Martin, and by the way Happy Birthday!” It felt a bit better knowing that at least someone remembered. I worked in a zombie like fashion until about one o’clock, when Joanne knocked on my door and said, “You know, it’s such a beautiful day outside, and it’s your Birthday, why don’t we go out for lunch, just you and me.” I said, “Thanks, Joanne, that’s the best thing I’ve heard all day. Let’s go!”

We went to lunch but not where we’d normally go. Instead she took me to a quiet bistro with a private table. We had a couple of mixed drinks and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Joanne said, “You know, It’s such a beautiful day… We don’t have to go right back to the office, do we?” I replied with “I suppose not. What do you have in mind?” She said, “Let’s go to my apartment, it’s just around the corner.”

After arriving at her apartment, Joanne turned to me and said, “If you don’t mind, I’m going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I’ll be right back.” “Ok.” I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake…
Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends, all singing “Happy Birthday”.
And I just sat there…
On the couch…
Naked.

Roboframer · Post by **Roboframer** » Fri 18 Apr, 2008 1:36 pm

Chortle!

The Crofter · Post by **The Crofter** » Fri 18 Apr, 2008 1:52 pm

Priceless...Happy Birthday

Post by **prospero** » Fri 18 Apr, 2008 1:53 pm

Bloody Hell. You had me going for while there Kap.

btw. If you ever do get into a real situation like that (without the suprise party) and have to think of a good excuse, all you need do is get a piece of chalk and put it behind your ear and go home and tell the absolute truth. Women don't miss anything, so the wife will call you a lying bastard and accuse you of being out all night playing darts.

So that's alright then.

Moglet · Post by **Moglet** » Fri 18 Apr, 2008 4:27 pm

Happy Birthday, Kaptain K!!

kaptain.kopter · Post by **kaptain.kopter** » Fri 18 Apr, 2008 4:43 pm

Thanks all.

Not really worth celebrating but can't turn down the wife taking me out for a curry.

Martin

Mary Case GCF · Post by **Mary Case GCF** » Fri 18 Apr, 2008 6:28 pm

Just read this thread. Belated hippo birdie 2 ewe, KK. Loved the joke

osgood · Post by **osgood** » Fri 18 Apr, 2008 8:34 pm

Happy Birthday Kaptain!
I hope you have plenty more of them and good health to enjoy them all!

WelshFramer · Post by **WelshFramer** » Sat 19 Apr, 2008 9:14 am

Just make the birthday last all week end so us latecomers can wish you happy birthday too.

Spit · Post by **Spit** » Sat 19 Apr, 2008 9:34 am

Oh no! I'll have to have several drinks for KK tonight, on top of a few for someone elses B'day and the ones I was going to drink anyway! It's going to be a dark ale night, so the quilt's going to be hovering 4ft above the bed by the morning! (parp)

Moglet · Post by **Moglet** » Sat 19 Apr, 2008 11:56 am

TMI!!!