The Framers Forum

A lady came in to the shop today and asked if I knew any good "dog rumours"

Well, I've had suspicions that next door's chocolate lab is gay, but I didn't think it was any of her business!

Are they the same as Horse's Doovers?

She perhaps thought that was quite a normal question for your shop John.

Well it was, I just spelled it wrong! Was asked if we sold hamster feeding bottles once.

Do you?

wouldn't surprise me he sells everything else )

I used to have a little old lady asking to invisible hairnets on a regular basis at my previous shop. It was a hairdressers before I moved in.


And no, I didn't give any smartarse answers.

No we don't sell hamster feeding bottles - the customer, well, the person, came in with a broken one, like a tube with a smaller tube sticking out of it "Do you sell these"

"What is it"? Which is another way of saying 'No'!

I regularly give smartarse answers on 'the other 'side' of the shop - I think my best was ... "Have you got any 18 year old cards"?

"Doubt it, we've only been here 10"

I know a question which should get a 'yes' answer in Frames & Stitches of Angmering - " Do you enjoy dreaming up smartarse answers?".

"What will you take off for cash?"



Smartarse answers below if you please.......

That wouldn't get a 'yes' answer - only 'my trousers'.

"my shoe and smack you around the face with it"

old masters is funnier though

prospero wrote:I used to have a little old lady asking to invisible hairnets on a regular basis at my previous shop. It was a hairdressers before I moved in.


And no, I didn't give any smartarse answers.

If she was asking for 'invisible hair nets on a regular basis' you are surely missing a profit opportunity - hairdresser, framer or whatever - first rule of entrepreneurial business - Identify a need and supply it.

After a few visits she cottoned on to the fact that the erstwhile hairdressing business had moved to a downstairs premises. Directly underneath my workshop in fact. They did this to save little old ladies climbing the stairs.

You don't get any little old ladies in then? Might be a blessing though - my workshop was upstairs and many years ago had a LOL, 85 at least, in one day clutching a frame with an embroidery in; the mitre had sprung at one corner - " It's come apart, and you framed it " she announced indignantly. I turned the frame over and sure enough, there was our sticker on the back, albeit a very old version. I looked at the embroidery and asked what it was - " Front 'o me weddin' dress, an' it's come apart, an' you framed it" she repeated even more indignantly. I gently enquired when 'we' framed it. " 1939, an' it's come apart" she thundered. So I indulgently said that, although it had been done before we bought the business, we'd put it right. " When?" She snapped. I said it would be a week or so, but I'd give her a ring when it was ready. I did a complete new spectacular framing job on it, no exspense spared and phoned her. She turned up the next day, looked at it with no expression and said " About time an' all " and stormed out without another word. Ahh, customer service is everything...

Well when they come in to pick up jobs they left about four years past I usually tell them it'll be ready on Thursday.

No doubt mixed in with the " I'm waiting for the moulding/mountboard/glass to come in" excuses. Very good regular customers are a pain for that - I've got one that's kept a note of all of 'em!

The dog ate my underpinner.